jokes-post some jokes
- DonPadreArni
- Posts: 433
- Joined: Fri Jan 05, 2007 1:00
- Location: Poland,Tychy
ok polish ppl read this : (fast)
tea who you yeee bunny
hehe it looks normal but sounds funny xD
if someone know how to transate this on english pls do that cuz i cant
tea who you yeee bunny
hehe it looks normal but sounds funny xD
if someone know how to transate this on english pls do that cuz i cant
- SoLInvictuS
- Posts: 65
- Joined: Thu Jul 05, 2007 0:00
3 blondes are hunting in the forest
1 of them sopts some tracks on the ground
she goes "hey look, deer tracks!"
the one next to her goes "no no, those are bear tracks"
the one next to her goes "no no, those are bird tracks, lets follow them"
...after 5 minutes carefully following the tracks, they all hear something
the first one goes "told you it were deer tracks it's there sound"
the one next to her goes "no no, that is the sound of a bear"
the one next to her goes "no no, that is the sound of a bird"
... then they get hit by a train
1 of them sopts some tracks on the ground
she goes "hey look, deer tracks!"
the one next to her goes "no no, those are bear tracks"
the one next to her goes "no no, those are bird tracks, lets follow them"
...after 5 minutes carefully following the tracks, they all hear something
the first one goes "told you it were deer tracks it's there sound"
the one next to her goes "no no, that is the sound of a bear"
the one next to her goes "no no, that is the sound of a bird"
... then they get hit by a train
this is more like it
there is a man on a beach with no arms and no legs sun-bathing, later a fit girl comes up and says have u ever been hugged before? No replies the man so she hgs the man who now feels happy with himself, later the same girl comes back and asks the ma, Have u evr been kissed before? The man replies no and she gives him a biggggg kiss, the man is looking happier than ever. Later at the end of the day, the sexy women comes down and asks the man have u ever been f****d before? The mans eyes light up and he says No i havnt!!! and the women relpies You are now the tide is coming in
....................................................................................................
two islamic women in a bag shop one turns to the other and says "does my bomb look big in this" lmao
^^^^^^^ sorry that one is a little mean but funny
....................................................................................................
two islamic women in a bag shop one turns to the other and says "does my bomb look big in this" lmao
^^^^^^^ sorry that one is a little mean but funny
Somethin that suits to every forum. This also (rather especially this! ):
How many Forum users does it take to change a lightbulb?
1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been changed
14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently
7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs
27 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs
53 to flame the spell checkers
41 to correct spelling/grammar flames
6 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb" ...
another 6 to condemn those 6 as anal-retentive
2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is "lamp"
15 know-it-alls who claim *they* were in the industry, and that "light bulb" is perfectly correct
156 to email the participant's ISPs complaining that they are in violation of their "acceptable use policy"
109 to post that this group is not about light bulbs and to please take this discussion to a lightbulb group
203 to demand that cross posting to hardware forum, off-topic forum, and lightbulb group about changing light bulbs be stopped
111 to defend the posting to this group saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts *are* relevant to this group
306 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique and what brands are faulty
27 to post URL's where one can see examples of different light bulbs
14 to post that the URL's were posted incorrectly and then post the corrected URL's
3 to post about links they found from the URL's that are relevant to this group which makes light bulbs relevant to this group
33 to link all posts to date, quote them in their entirety including all headers and signatures, and add "Me too"
12 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy
19 to quote the "Me too's" to say "Me three"
4 to suggest that posters request the light bulb FAQ
44 to ask what is a "FAQ"
4 to say "didn't we go through this already a short time ago?"
143 to say "do a search on light bulbs before posting questions about light bulbs"
1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and start it all over again....
" Bite my metal shiny ass!!!"
<MooseOnDaLoose> Hey Mike
<goatboy> what?
<MooseOnDaLoose> Pussy.
<goatboy> er?
<MooseOnDaLoose> Pussy.
<goatboy> and?
<MooseOnDaLoose> Pussy.
<goatboy> ...
<MooseOnDaLoose> Pussy.
<goatboy> i dont get it
<MooseOnDaLoose> AND YOU NEVER WILL.
<goatboy> bastard
------------------------------------------------------------------
t0rbad> so there i was in this hallway right
BlackAdder> i believe i speak for all of us when i say...
BlackAdder> WRONG BTICH
BlackAdder> IM SICK OF YOU
BlackAdder> AND YOUR LAME STORIES
BlackAdder> NOBODY HERE THINKS YOURE FUNNY
BlackAdder> NOBODY HERE WANTS TO HEAR YOUR STORIES
BlackAdder> IN FACT
BlackAdder> IF YOU DIED RIGHT NOW
BlackAdder> I DON"T THINK NOBODY WOULD CARE
BlackAdder> SO WHAT DO YOU SAY TO THAT FAG
*** t0rbad sets mode: +b BlackAdder*!*@*.*
*** BlackAdder has been kicked my t0rbad ( )
t0rbad> so there i was in this hallway right
CRCError> right
heartless> Right.
r3v> right
I laughed like hell xDDD i hope u will 2
<goatboy> what?
<MooseOnDaLoose> Pussy.
<goatboy> er?
<MooseOnDaLoose> Pussy.
<goatboy> and?
<MooseOnDaLoose> Pussy.
<goatboy> ...
<MooseOnDaLoose> Pussy.
<goatboy> i dont get it
<MooseOnDaLoose> AND YOU NEVER WILL.
<goatboy> bastard
------------------------------------------------------------------
t0rbad> so there i was in this hallway right
BlackAdder> i believe i speak for all of us when i say...
BlackAdder> WRONG BTICH
BlackAdder> IM SICK OF YOU
BlackAdder> AND YOUR LAME STORIES
BlackAdder> NOBODY HERE THINKS YOURE FUNNY
BlackAdder> NOBODY HERE WANTS TO HEAR YOUR STORIES
BlackAdder> IN FACT
BlackAdder> IF YOU DIED RIGHT NOW
BlackAdder> I DON"T THINK NOBODY WOULD CARE
BlackAdder> SO WHAT DO YOU SAY TO THAT FAG
*** t0rbad sets mode: +b BlackAdder*!*@*.*
*** BlackAdder has been kicked my t0rbad ( )
t0rbad> so there i was in this hallway right
CRCError> right
heartless> Right.
r3v> right
I laughed like hell xDDD i hope u will 2
Greetz,
VanQ'
VanQ'
Lilith wrote:At a jewelry store, a young man bought an expensive locket as a present for his girlfriend. "Don't you want her name engraved upon it?" asked the jeweler. The young man thought for a moment, and then, ever the pragmatic, steadfastly replied,
"No, just engrave it: To My One And Only Love. That way, if we break up and she throws it back to me in anger, I can use it again."
:P:P:P:P:P:P:P
HA nice one:)
BOWDOWN wrote:Three men, an Italian, a French and a Spanish went for a job interview in England. Before the interview, they were told that they must compose a sentence in English with three main words: green, pink and yellow.
The Italian was first:
"I wake up in the morning. I see the yellow sun. I see the green grass and I think to myself, I hope it will be a pink day."
The Spanish was next:
"I wake up in the morning, I eat a yellow banana, a green pepper and in the evening I watch the pink panther on TV."
Last was the French:
"I wake up in the morning, I hear the phone "green...green...", I pink up the phone and I say "Yellow ?..."
Like those jokes.
this is no different:)
CrossYard wrote:One day at Sunday school, the teacher was asking the kids
where Jesus lives. The teacher picked on one of the kids.
"Jesus lives in my heart."
"Very good." said the teacher.
She picks on another kid who replies, "Jesus lives in
Heaven."
Very good said the teacher.
Little Johnny is in the back just waving his hand to be
called on. The teacher didn't want to call on little Johnny
but finally did.
"Jesus lives in the bathroom."
After a moment, the teacher asked why he lived in the
bathroom.
"Every morning when my dad gets up he bangs on the bathroom
door and asks Jesus Christ are you still in there?"
lol!!!
a 87 year old grandpa comes to the docter for a checking session.
so everything was good
now the docter wanted to ask him personal question so grandpa said yes you can ask
so docter asked how is it with the sexlife.
grandpa said i think good it takes 2 hours and 20 minutes
so docter was like wtf how do you do it 2hours and 20 minutes?
so grandpa explained:
19 minutes to get it up
1 minute to get to my orgasm
and 2 hours i lie for apegape (it's dutch else nt funny:P it means being totally broken:P)
so everything was good
now the docter wanted to ask him personal question so grandpa said yes you can ask
so docter asked how is it with the sexlife.
grandpa said i think good it takes 2 hours and 20 minutes
so docter was like wtf how do you do it 2hours and 20 minutes?
so grandpa explained:
19 minutes to get it up
1 minute to get to my orgasm
and 2 hours i lie for apegape (it's dutch else nt funny:P it means being totally broken:P)
thanks diamond:)
very funny video (if it works)
also watch part 2 and 3.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oQm_8vX3sYU
greetz ->VULCAN<-
also watch part 2 and 3.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oQm_8vX3sYU
greetz ->VULCAN<-
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